Friday, July 4, 2008

Happy Secession Day, Y'all!


Y'all know, of corse, 232 years ago t’day, the Colonies hear in Amerika, 13 of ‘em anyways, seceded frum dat British Empire-- a mighty fine day in tha histo'y of our peoples and of liberty an' se'f determinashun in a general sorta way.

We whooped the tar out of ‘em hear in ol' Carolina! [Ahhh! Jest think’a Genral Moultrie sending Admiral Parter back our t’sea in that big ol’ ship with all the fancy cannons and such frum a small palmetter tree fort on Sullivan’s Island! Da Swamp Fox, ambushin' dem red coats! Yes, sir! Whin giants walked in da Earth!]

Anyways, on de forth, I kinda like t'read the Declareeshun of Independence (Shoulda been called Tha Declareeshun of Secessun, I think-- more appropos, as they say). I read hit this mornin'. Mighty fine reedin’! Here's the part I like tha best:

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.--Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government...

[Such turn of phrase, Mista Jefferson! Mighty fine readin'!]

It’s a dawg-gone shame, I tell ya, dat we no longer believe dat govment derives its jest powers frum tha consent of tha govahned!

Dat "revolushunary" idea stopped in 1865 when tha South was fo'ced t'submit t'an autho'ity frum which they had took-back their consent. [Now, fer my yankee reeders, dat’s a damn fact and I’m a not apoligise fer it! Dat’s when hit all started; dat's when we all lost! Period. ]

Anyways, dis here set a precedent dat has corntinued t'destroy our da-gum liberties on account o' its innovashun an' implementashun by wicked usurpers an' tyrants who hav a trampled tha Consteetooshun of our fo'barers unner foot to make us, tha peoples, subjecks to tha big ol' gov'ment rite hear in our own damn country! Wuz it not tha intent of our fo'barers t'have hit tha other way aroun'? Sho'nuff twas!

An now we know dat tha govment derives its (unjust) powers frum tha point of a bayonet, tha barrel of a gun, o' tha receivin' ind of tha bomb!

It also derives its (unjust) powers by tha intimidashun of tha citizens by tha tax colleckter an' other govment agenceys and regulaters who terro'ize an' intimithae tha peoples into submisshun.

Damn shame, I’d say. To hav fallen so dern far, dis peoples, a daaaamn shame!

Now, we believe, o' hav been lead t'believe, dat MITE MAKES RITE.

Now dis here was not tha foun'ashun on which our country was established!

I can a see no reason t'celebrate tha principles dat lead tha Colonies t'secede frum tha British Empire on account o' we, no longer hold them truths to be se'f-evident o' unalienable, fo’ that matter. Just traded one empire fer another, seems ta me… One King George fer another. All de while talking ‘bout our freedoms! Make me wanna cuss!

Although glo'ious in 1776, "Independence Day" in 2008 is a troublin' day fer myself-- a day filled wif joy, so'row, an' anger-- especially fo' them of us who still believe in them unalienable rights-- them rights which tha Laws of Nature an' of Nature's God intitle us-- them rights claimed by our fo'barers an' paid fo' wif tha blood of patriots...

Y’all think on dat whist yer popin’ fire-crackers and eatin’ pulled pork!

Cooter Brown
Jefferson Station, South Carolina